after a hurricane comes a rainbow

The problem with confiding in friends is that they always just say “You need help”. They don’t understand that all we want is someone to listen to us.

It’s like I’m behind this glass wall. I can see everything happening, yet it doesn’t affect me at all. I can’t do anything about it. It’s this mundane place that I can’t seem to leave

I need you to listen to me. I don’t want you to tell me I need help, or go tell someone else. I need you to listen to me and hug me when I cry.

And we all have a secret that not even our best friend will know.

And sometimes I think ‘maybe I’ll always have to live in this darkness, this shadow that is always hovering over my happiness. Maybe I will never be truly happy ever again’

“What happened to your arm? “Oh, um.. My cat” “Hahaha you look like a cutter” “Ha…”

What I hate the most about opening up to people is the look. The look of pity. I don’t want your motherfucking pity, I want your friendship. That’s all I need right now.

I don’t know. I guess I just miss how things used to be.

I’m not even suicidal anymore. I’m just tired. After all of this shit I’m just so fucking tired.

Sometimes we have to let go of what’s hurting us, even if it hurts to let go. We have to realize that people aren’t who they say they are, and they will break promises. Dads, who were your heroes, end up being a fraud. Your mom’s kisses don’t fix all wounds, and monsters are created in our heads.